Wise Words for Creating Your Life…

My passion; helping women to create the life they truly deserve… Why is it necessary? Because retouched-1826856_1280so many women, including me, get stuck in the rut of ‘going through the motions‘ and then externalising blame.
The phrase ‘creating’ life is nothing new, it has been a topical discussion for many years and I found this very thought provoking piece by Anais Nin from ‘A Woman Speaks’:
“There are two ways of going about liberation: one, of course, is the political way, changing the laws and fighting for equalities. There are so many ways of doing it. But the other I stress simply because it is the one I know: the psychological way, which is the removal of obstacles so that you can create your own freedom and you don’t have to ask for it. You don’t have to wait for it to be given to you. And the women I chose as my heroines were women who created their own freedom. They didn’t demand it, they didn’t ask for it. They created it. Something in themselves made them independent women, and this kind of independence I stress. Because the other feeling that has been taught women is the blaming of society or the blaming of men for the situation in which we find ourselves.
Now I found through psychology that when I put the blame on others I was practically saying “I am a helpless, passive victim.” And it’s a depressing thought! So the day I saw beyond that, at a certain moment in psychology, I saw “No, not at all. I am the master of my destiny.” When I feel free and independent and behave in a certain way towards a relationship, that affects the relationship. I can have an effect on it; I can have an effect on the person I am working for, on my publisher. It is very easy to blame society or to blame the man, but it actually makes you feel even more helpless. Because that means that you are waiting for the man to liberate you, for the government to liberate you or for history. And that takes a long time. It takes centuries, and it’s too slow for me.
We have only one life.”
I love this piece, it resonates completely with the way I think about taking ownership of one’s life. Who wants someone else to dictate their life path to them? Surely it is our responsibility to live a life that we deem to be worthy.
So what is your take? Do you work to create your life or are you led? And if led, does it compromise your belief in your ability to ‘do it your way’? I’d love to know…
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2 Comments Add yours

  1. Jay Peters says:

    My wife has been experiencing this postpartum blues. Before she was a vibrant, dynamic, proactive person. And now when it's time for her to be like this after the birth of our son, she went on a downtrend. It's not a medical condition, it's like something inside her died when her plans went awry and we had a baby. I'll let her read this because I know that for your plans to take effect you have to work it.

  2. Jay, it's great that you are looking out for ways to support your wife back to her former dynamic self. Being a mother myself I can empathize with your wife. When you have children it does change your life but it should not stop you from achieving your goals (although they might be delayed or take a little longer). You can impact her motivation by supporting and encouraging her to keep her dreams alive. No doubt in time she will return to her vibrant self and your son will have the joy of being brought up by two wonderful role models. We have some great free resources at http://www.yvonnebltd.com

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